I have been reflecting on Gender following a reread of Conundrum by Jan Morris. The book that caused my light bulb moment of understanding that I was transgender and not just a weird freak…well maybe that too but not in respect of my gender dysphoria which I at last began to understand. In Conundrum JanContinue reading “Gender fluidity”
Author Archives: emibee1
A long time coming
Maybe this has been a long time coming……I am not sure, as I was unaware that it needed to come at all. All my life I have been wanting to be something other than I am, or is that was? The obvious one was that I wanted to transition. However, that is with hindsight. IContinue reading “A long time coming”
Still isolating
I have been isolating for the best part of eight weeks now. I am being shielded by the people I share the house with as I am in what is classed as a vulnerable group. People talk of the “new normal” when the reach of the virus is contained. I feel this is true andContinue reading “Still isolating”
Music
I have been wondering about the effects of being more centred again in myself. It seems to me that as I grew through my teen years and into adulthood my life became distorted by my gender dysphoria. It took most of my energy. I made sure I had no time to dwell on anything. AsContinue reading “Music”
Stages
Stages I have been reflecting on the various stages I have passed through while transitioning. Not the act of transitioning itself more the various aims and goals that I have passed through in creating my current style of womanhood. Although I feel at the moment where I am is more or less the end productContinue reading “Stages”
Reflection
In this unusual time my self-isolation continues and although continuing to work from home I am amazed by how much more time I have to reflect on my life. I have transitioned late in life. It is easy to say how I wish I had done so years ago, my life would have been soContinue reading “Reflection”
Travelling’ thru’
I hadn’t realised that Dolly Parton’s song Travelling thru was the soundtrack TransAmerica, a film about a pre-op transwoman on a road trip across America. When I realised that it was I looked up the lyrics;- I’m out here on my journey, trying to make the most of itI’m a puzzle, I must figure outContinue reading “Travelling’ thru’”
Fear
While I am in isolation I have been looking back and wondering why it took me so long to transition. I know I am “mature” and I was growing up pre-internet but the main reason preventing me from transitioning was fear. It seems there were many stages before I came to the realisation that IContinue reading “Fear”
Settling in
I am self-isolating. I am taking the necessary precautions recommended and washing my hands frequently so `I am hoping I will be safe and come through this fit and healthy I miss not being able to go the beauty salon for my electrolysis which although that was painful, the whole experience added to my femininityContinue reading “Settling in”
On my own
Sadly, I am of an age that is covered by the request to self-isolate though this virus pandemic. In fact it is likely in the very near future it will not be a matter of choice. What does that mean for my transition. The first casualty is an appointment with a Consultant Psychiatrist who hasContinue reading “On my own”